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Love and Platforms

Was glad to see an overwhelming response to one of my previous post on Platforms and Relationships but could not help noticing the irony in subjecting our relationship to the whims of an algorithm !
Of course, Covid19 has hit us harder and made two best bets- Office and College- unavailable for finding soulmates. So, people have turned to platforms to seek love. Let me take this discussion forward and explore Love on Platforms.

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DTW

During the Week, Elliot Page, the Oscar-nominated star known for Juno, Whip It, and Umbrella Academy came out as trans. And Ellliot used Instagram to share this news with millions of fans and well wishers. Platforms have been instrumental in creating a safe space mostly though anonymity and closed groups thereby making it easier for people to find love in all its form and shape.

Match @Match

Wondering if the feelings are mutual? Introducing Dates: a first-of-its-kind feature that provides clarity and focus by moving members’ most important connections to a dedicated space within the app. Read more about it here!: blog.match.com/post/dates-a-h…

Pandemic with its mandatory lockdowns, closed public spaces and social distancing norms has thrown the entire dating scene off-track. In fact, match.com hired dating coaches to dole out advice during one-on-one conversations with more than 15,000 of its users. This initiative helped them to keep a pulse on what’s going on in the mind of its members, and thus provided feedback for the dating business to evolve and adapt. Most the platforms started matching users preferences on social distancing and in fact started features like ‘dating from home’ or simply in-app video calling services in their respective platforms.

BBC News (UK) @BBCNews

Whole otter love ❤️

bbc.inOtters find ‘fairytale’ love in lockdownThe pair were brought together in Scarborough after both losing their partners.

Identity and staying safe in real life plays an important role in determining choice of platforms for finding relationships. Platforms like Bumble and Her are specific to women and Queer Women respectively. They have empowered the target group to take control of their relationships and find love on their own terms.

Platforms like “The League” continue to create an Ivy League experience for its users as it would require job title, college and LinkedIn profile of the applicant. Of course, your chances of striking a match would diminish if you are from a metro with a long waiting line unless you are willing to pay up to get ahead in line.

Location based platforms can help in finding the connections from your proximity. For example, Happn helps users find matches with people who are located nearby and thus seems more organic but surely can not beat Tinder which simply displays distance between users.

savage_balika_ @savage_balika

Am i the only one who didn't got a "mein tera edit."🥺

In an earlier newsletter about Platforms and Seniors, I have written that the curse of old age for many of our seniors has been loss of relationships and spark of life. Whether we talk about either Non Profits like Anubandh Foundation or Happy Seniors dating services providing matchmaking for seniors, the idea is to have a bond of like minded seniors who would live a better life with a new partner.

Platform design principles include designing for market thickness leading to congestion where match making is elusive at best and harassment at worst. Most of the dating platforms gather and sell information about users for marketing thus may expose users data to bad actors. Users’ personal information may accidentally be released through bugs in their software, and by hackers through inadequate security.

Users must take adequate precautions while Getting Started, Connecting Online with Potential Dates and definitely while Considering Meeting In Real Life (IRL).

After all, whether online or IRL, Jigar Moradabadi has this eternal advise!

ये इश्क़ नहीं आसाँ इतना ही समझ लीजे

इक आग का दरिया है और डूब के जाना है

जिगर मुरादाबादी

OTW

Over the Weekend, PeeranCheruvu Runners had their Sixth Anniversary Run aptly called Khoon-Pasina Edition 2020. We collaborated with Aarohi Blood Bank to spread awareness about Blood Donation and contributed 75 units of blood from volunteers. Runners promised to contribute “Sweat“ for Donors “"Blood” and thereby created “Health for All”.

Shailendra S Bisht @ProfBisht

Proud to be part of #PeerancheruvuRunners Annual Run. #KhoonPasina #BloodDonation #AarohiBloodBank #HyderabadRunners #PBELCITYHydWinterHalf2020

Running and Love are somewhat similar- You get what you put in.
Long Distance Running is nothing less than a lifelong love affair with its own trial & tribulations and usually tests the runner multiple times. Not so much during training but definitely during the event, you would get the feeling- “"Why am I doing this?”. Of course, the euphoria at the end of run makes it all go away and leave you wanting to do it once again.

मत पूछ कि क्या हाल है मेरा तेरे पीछे
तू देख कि क्या रंग है तेरा, मेरे आगे
- दीवाने-ग़ालिब

I have imagined myself humming this couplet from Mirza Ghalib more than once at the finish line while holding my finisher medal.

I Love You

Shailendra

PS- It would be fair to add the disclaimer that all the analysis in this newsletter is based on published sources and discussion with younger friends. Fortunately or unfortunately, I can not blame an algorithm for my soul mate choice of more than two decades now.

As on 1st Dec 2020 , completed 19 years and counting of being married !

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